Wednesday, April 28, 2010

Love Hurts

My baby has learned how to hug.  I'm never quite sure if I'm making stuff up or not until someone else verifies it for me (like how Monkey sings himself to sleep in the back seat of the car - my mom heard it too so it's real).  And the only reason I know that the hugs are for real is because I heard my husband say last night, "What the heck is that all about?," and when I looked over Monkey was hugging.

Now, before you get all gooey and you want a Monkey hug yourself, let me explain something... Monkey hugs hurt - a lot.  I'm not sure where Monkey learned to hug (maybe from Def Leppard - little pop culture for you children of the 80s... and if you weren't a child of the 80s, Def Leppard sang a song called "Love Bites" about how painful love is... fabulous power ballad) but it is not a pleasant experience.

There are basically 3 phases to the Monkey Hug.

Phase 1: He bombs his head towards your face and wherever it lands it lands.  Often this results in a bone on bone collision or a bone on your glasses/lips/nose.  I believe this is his version of the cuddle.

Phase 2: He flings his arms somewhere above your shoulders and around your neck.  This is the least painful phase, it all depends on whether or not I've cut his nails lately (and since I've made him bleed twice the likelihood is that I haven't cut his nails lately).

Phase 3: He grabs a fist of your hair and pulls... hard.  For you short-haired or straight-haired people this phase is probably not as painful as those of you with long curly hair.  Because the long curly hair he can grab, twist, and pull and his little fist stays all balled up in your hair.  For everyone else his fist will just fly off of your hair.

And that is a Monkey hug.  Incredibly adorable and incredibly painful.  I love it and fear it at the same time.

In other news, last night Monkey said "ma ma ma ma ma."  I know he was just making syllables but my heart skipped a beat anyway.

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