Countdown (5 days to go)

There are very few surprises for us in this pregnancy.  We know the day that Chloe was conceived (when you are tracking your ovulation it isn't hard to figure out).  We know we are having a girl and we know the day she will be born (unless my body all the sudden decides that labor isn't such a bad idea).  And, this is exactly how I like it since I'm a firm believer that surprises are HIGHLY overrated.

But, there is one thing that will be a surprise and it is driving me crazy.  I can't wait to see who Chloe is going to look like.  Is she going to come out blonde haired (although barely there) and blue eyed like her brother or will she came out with a mess of black hair and green/hazel eyes like her mother or will she shock all of us and re-introduce the red hair of my mom's Irish ancestry?

Because the first time I saw Evan and he was almost bald, pale in hair, eyes, and skin, it was quite a shock.  I think I just assumed he would come out with dark hair. In fact, I asked Brian, again and again, if he was sure that he was with Evan every step of the way (since I was hanging out with the Pigs in Space).  And I continued to feel this way about him (confused about his origins) until recently when two things happened.

The first thing was that over Christmas my Aunt Jolyne gave my dad a DVD of old family movies (transferred from old reels).  The DVD included family moments all the way through my young childhood.  And at one point as I was watching me frolic I swear I was looking at a darker version of Evan.  It was really creepy.

The second thing happened when I was unpacking all of my albums recently.  I have an album of childhood photos that my mom gave to me a few years back.  I was flipping through and came across this photo:

(I have no idea who the little girl is with me or where we are but that is me on the right.)

And when I saw this photo it reminded me of one I had recently posted:



So, morale of the story, I can't wait to see Chloe and meet her in person.

Countdown (6 days to go)

So, to commemorate Miss Chloe's arrival I felt I would take the remaining days (6 to be exact) and post something I'm looking forward to each day. 

Today, I'm looking forward to cuddling my little girl.  Evan will sometimes come up and sit with me on the couch and occasionally even lean against me but the cuddling days are long gone.  I can't wait to have that little baby weight against me, leaning into me, trying to get as close as possible and then peacefully sleeping on me. 

This is what I'm talking about:

(Evan, 3 weeks old, sleeping on Daddy)

Monkey Attachment and the Impending Addition

I have always been someone who forms strong attachments with inanimate objects.  My mother tells a story about an inconsolable 2 year old (this would be me) whose blankie was "misplaced" during a trip to visit friends.  I don't remember that incident, but I do remember when Mrs. Piggle Wiggle I (this would be my pillow for about 12 years) exploded.  I mean this literally.  I held on to a pillow for 12 years and when I was 16 years old I came home from school (with my boyfriend at the time which may be why my mother was spared a complete meltdown) and my mother ushered me to the washing machine.  She opened it up and when I peered in it was full of feathers and fabric.  The story I was told was that my cat had vomited on the pillow and when my mom attempted to wash it the pillow literally disintegrated in the washing machine.  I held back the tears to be cool in front of my boyfriend but I was devastated (and in case you are wondering, at 36 years old I'm currently sleeping with Mrs. Piggle Wiggle II... and yes, I've seen the talk shows about how often you should change your pillows).

Because of my attachments I've been waiting to see if Monkey would form anything strong and lasting with one of his belongings.  You may remember that for a while I thought Doggie was going to get the coveted spot of honor.  But after a couple of weeks he joined the rest of the stuffed animals in the stuffed animal bin and is only occasionally squealed over.

Then, we moved him for the third time in his short life and all the sudden Evan was holding tight to Lambie:

It started with Evan bringing Lambie with him out of the crib.  He would bring Lambie downstairs and then leave him somewhere.  At first, it didn't matter if Lambie was back in the crib for naps or night time.  And then that changed one nap.  I put him in his crib, he looked around and started to melt down.  I had to drag my pregnant behind up and down the stairs one more time to make sure Lambie was in the crib.  We have also made the next evolution... he tried to bring Lambie outside today.  I assume it was to play.  But Lambie is not allowed to leave this house... because I really like to sleep the 20 minutes a night I get.

Look at the joy this dirty old thing brings Evan (Brian swears when we bought Lambie he was bright white... now he is kind of a cream-dirty-smudged-chocolate-stained-loved-dirty-beast):

In a related note, I'm not sure if there is any correlation or not but as my belly gets bigger it is becoming harder and harder to keep that pacifier out of Evan's mouth. 

And speaking of Chloe... I went to my weekly appointment today and the consensus is that unless I'm some freak of medical nature we will be going forward with my c-section next Thursday (yes... next Thursday).  It appears that Chloe is quite comfortable where she is and is still transverse (lying across my belly).  Additionally my cervix is still closed and hard, there is no engagement, and I haven't had any contractions.  My doctor won't speculate about Chloe's size because it seems that just like with Evan my water is rather large (but this time I'm only carrying the fluid in my womb instead of all over my entire body).

It's weird, but this will be our last weekend as a 3-person family.  And honestly, my back is kind of okay with that.

Reproduction: Why We Do It More Than Once

So, for those readers who have a child or children this post probably won't be that big of a surprise for you.  But, for those of you who don't yet have any children (or maybe never did/will) this may be a big surprise to you.  I have unlocked the reason that human beings have more than one child.  And no, it isn't the biological need to leave behind something.  In this day and age of birth control that answer is just bonkers.  The truth, the real truth (and everyone will shake their head as soon as they read this) is a faulty memory.

Let me explain... this past week (as in yesterday) a lovely virus came to visit me.  Thankfully it only chose to stay for 24 hours, but it left an impression.  It started with some issues I'd rather not type.  At first I didn't know this was a virus so I looked up the issues on the Internet (you know, the place that knows all things and nothing) and apparently these issues could be an early sign of labor.  Apparently the theory is that your body is cleansing itself.  So, once the vomiting kicked in and I still wasn't sure if it was a virus I called my OB to find out what was going on.  The nurse asked me if I was having contractions and I said, "I don't think so."  She then asked me if I had any other children, to which I answered yes, and she was confused how I wouldn't know what a contraction felt like and I had to tell her I honestly couldn't remember.

I know... this sounds nuts.  But, you have to remember, that with Evan I was induced at midnight and didn't have my first contraction until late afternoon.  So I was super tired.  And, although Brian remembers it differently, I swear I only had one or two before I gave up and asked for the epidural.  I do remember sitting on my birthing ball with Brian massaging my lower back but other than that I got nothing.

And so I started to think about my pregnancy/birth with Evan and here is what I remember:

• Once I got pregnant I remember no complications with the pregnancy.
• Yes I was swollen but I don't remember it as being particularly painful or bothersome.
• I had carpal tunnel syndrome.  And while I don't remember it being bad, I do remember saying to Brian at one point that I used to think people over-reacted to their carpal tunnel symptoms but that once I had it I felt they must downplay them.
• I remember sleeping in my chaise lounge but thinking that it was a good solution.

Then I read my third trimester blog and realized that most of what I remembered was a watered down version of reality.  That apparently the swelling was way worse and the carpal tunnel syndrome was so bad I couldn't even cut my own food the last month of pregnancy.  That sleeping with Evan was just as difficult as sleeping with Chloe (seriously, I'm at about 40 minutes at a time). 

And that was how I came to this epiphany.  If I truly sat down and remembered all the miscellaneous aggravation, pain, etc that comes along with pregnancy then I don't know that I would have jumped right back in so quickly.  I mean, Evan was totally worth it but there is no guarantee that the second one is going to be just as cute as the first.  And so, I stand by my claim that the key to human procreation is simply memory loss.

But not to leave you without a picture of cuteness... here is Evan with Daddy and Grandma on his swing set (Brian's parents came up for a last hurrah with Evan as an only child):

Poignant Moment

I had this rather poignant moment happen the other day and as I explain it to you let's remember I'm pregnant and at the highly emotional stage so it may be more dramatic than it needs to be.

Monkey and I were walking down to the mailbox (like we do every day when it isn't raining) and a truck full of teenage boys drove past.  One of the boys was yelling something out the window.  The truck was loud so I couldn't hear what he was saying but I could tell it wasn't nice.  While I was getting annoyed with the boys, I saw my little son, out of the corner of my eye, waving and smiling at the boys.  And my heart almost broke.

It made me realize that someday Monkey's naivete will disappear and he will realize that not all people in this world are nice or kind.  It's not a lesson I really want to watch him learn.

This having kids thing is difficult in ways I never even imagined.

I'm Back...

Yeah, I've been gone for far too long.  What have I been doing?  Well...

1. I was super sick for about 5 days with some sort of viral cold that literally had me laid up in bed.  Thankfully Brian was able to take some time off work and thankfully I'm in my third trimester so I could have drugs.
2. Still finishing out the house.  Mostly at the decorating and hanging pictures point.  This is all entirely too much work if you ask me.
3. Trying to handle Monkey.  He is one of the most amazing children but he comes with a super strong will.  Right now we are battling over whether or not it is okay to a) climb on to the kitchen table, or b) move the kitchen chairs around the great room to gain access to the kitchen counters/buffet/anything he shouldn't be touching.  So far I'm losing the battle but I'm still in it so you never know what might happen.
4. Evan also decided it was time to ditch the high chair and move on to a booster.  The only problem is that he loves to push himself away from the table.  This is one of those things I don't like about hardwood floors - things slide very easily across them.
5. Oh yeah, and have I mentioned I'm gestating and each day I'm getting bigger and bigger?  In fact, last week the OB I saw (not my normal OB, I just finished that stupid part of pregnancy where you have to meet all the OBs and midwives in case you go in to labor and your OB isn't on call even though we all know I'm not going in to labor) exclaimed over how big I am.  Here I am close to the end of 35 weeks (this past Saturday). 

And, just to let you know, only 2 days earlier I was actually asked if I'm only carrying one child or if there are multiples in there.  For the record.... there is only one little girl in there.

On top of all the above things, we did get to have some fun this weekend.  Humidity with heat has descended on Atlanta so Saturday was better spent indoors.  We went to the Fernbank Museum (one of my favorites in Atlanta - Monkey is a little too young for most exhibits but they have a new and fabulous exhibit for children called NatureQuest).

We started off at the Dinosaur fountain outside where Monkey threw in coins and supposedly made some wishes:

Then we went to the "Mythic Creatures" exhibit where Monkey and Daddy found their inner mythic creature:

Then we went to the NatureQuest exhibit which is this highly interactive exhibit where children can explore... well... nature.  I was able to sit for a lot of the time (refer to earlier gestating picture if you have questions why) but I still was able to take some good pictures:

Monkey exploring the dirt of an anthill.

Monkey and Daddy enjoying the "waterfall" that is the entrance to a cave.

Monkey sitting in Mommy's "lap" while he explores the inside of a tree stump.

Monkey exploring the different types of bugs in Georgia.

Monkey playing with creatures under the sea.

We all had a blast.  In fact, one we got in the car to get home to eat and sleep, Evan fell asleep immediately.  I guess we tuckered the poor boy out.

Warning: So, I'm hoping to continue to blog over the next few weeks but since my c-section is scheduled for May 5, my posts may get more and more sporadic as we get closer.