Monkey Milestones

Last Friday, Monkey hit the 6 month mark (I know, I teared a little, he is growing up WAY too fast) so I thought this would be a good time to check out his milestones: 1) Where he's at (syntax purposely done as a nod to my Jersey roots, and if that sentence doesn't look weird to you then you are probably from New Jersey), 2) The ones I think he will skip, and 3) Where I hope he is going next.

Let's remember where we started:

Where He is At (or what he can do so far):

• Rolls over to his right side
• Hangs out on his stomach
• Can lift his entire torso off the ground
• Makes grown women swoon
• Smiles... a lot
• Belly laughs when Daddy throws him high in to the air (and when Mommy pretends to eat his belly)
• Can grab things with his fingers (according to Brian this is a milestone, I had no idea)
• Knows that objects still exist even though they have left his line of sight
• Can track things - specifically can track 4 cats as they attempt to walk around him in this very small loft
• Grabs Mommy's glasses and hair
• Babbles incessantly
• Has two bottom teeth poking through (with many more on the way)
• Eats solid food and grabs the spoon to "do it himself"
• Holds his bottle (not well, but he holds up)
• Sits up with minimal assistance
• Has the loudest, most piercing scream
• Used to sleep through the night... a long long time ago
• Champion pooper (true story, I have the ribbon to prove it)
• Wants to crawl badly
• Attention span is now up to 5 minutes
• Stand with minimal assistance and lots of wobbliness (so not a word)

And here is where we are now:

Things I Think He Will Skip:

• Unless turning to his left is going to get him to crawl, he isn't going to do it. There is no benefit to the situation for him. He is way too smart to just do something because.
• While he has, once or twice, rolled completely over it has always been by accident and has never been purposely repeated. In Evan's mind, you crawl on your stomach so why roll over.
• Stranger danger - the only strangers Evan doesn't like are those that don't pay attention to him... seriously he gets very annoyed with those people.
• Doing his own laundry or cooking his own meals. Come on, he is the first Italian son of a partially Italian momma... what do you think is going to happen?

 
Where I Hope He is Going Next (conveniently split in to time frames for your pleasure):

Within 1 week:

• All teeth are in
• Sleeps through the night (at least 12 hours straight)

Within 2 weeks:

• Crawls and baby proofs the house himself
• Finds his "inside voice"

Within 3 weeks:

• Talks and tells me what the heck is going on inside his brain
• Potty trained (or changes his own diaper, I'll take either)

Within 4 weeks:

• Makes his own bottles and solid food
• Feeds himself
• Scoops litter

PS - So I literally posted this like 10 minutes ago, and just to prove me wrong, I put Monkey on the ground and he immediately turned to his left.  I want a bumper sticker that says "Motherhood... At least it's never boring".